Worship as a Mom

A.W. Tozer once said, “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thin about us.” He understood that how we view God impacts our daily lives, our decisions, our areas of influence, and the roles we fill in the lives of those around us. As worship leaders, we know that the secret place with the Lord is where we can enter His presence and where He reveals Himself to us. We are filled with His Spirit to overflow to those around us. In all things, we seek to worship the Lord and lead others to see Him for who He is and help them respond to His glory appropriately.

As a mom and worship leader I began to reflect on mothers in the Bible who worshipped and led their children in lives of worship. In the book of 1 Samuel we see a glimpse into the life of a woman named Hannah. Immediately, in the first chapter, it is apparent that she was grieved over not being able to bear children. In her deep sorrow she cried out to the Lord and vowed that if the Lord would give her a son, she would give him back to the Lord for His service. This petition, coupled with the vow of sacrifice (worship), was irresistible to the Lord and He heard and answered her. This story of sacrifice reminds us of Abraham being willing to offer his son Isaac, however, the Lord never asked Hannah for her son, she offered him to the Lord as a living sacrifice before he was even conceived. God answered her prayer and she fulfilled her vow and gave Samuel to the Lord’s service. 

Who was this woman whose prayer and worship moved the heart of God and influenced the life of one would grow to be so influential in Israel’s history? In only a matter of three or four short years Hannah had with her son, we see the impact of a mother who worshipped God through sacrifice. The second chapter of 1 Samuel reveals a glimpse of Hannah’s personal revelation of God that led her to rejoice as she gave an incredibly costly sacrifice. The impact of his mother’s faith and worship undoubtably influenced her young son. Samuel was then raised by the priest Eli, who’s own sons were known for their disregard and irreverence towards God in worship for reasons we can only speculate. However, Samuel’s mother and father instilled the love and fear of God in his heart, as displayed in their devotion to God in sacrificial worship. Even from a young age, he ministered before the Lord and the Lord found in him an ear open to His voice, which was “rare” in those days (1 Sam 3:1). Samuel stood on the shoulders of his mother’s faith and life of sacrificial worship which prepared him for a life given to the voice of the Lord and ministering to His people.

The song of Hannah as recorded in 1 Samuel 2 reminds me of another young woman who attracted the attention of God, so much that He chose her to bear and raise His own Son. Mary’s Magnificat song in Luke 1:46-56 also reveals her own deep revelation of God that led her to respond with praise. Both of these mothers sang songs that made known their hearts of worship that were deeply rooted in their revelation of God. These women who lived lives of worship and sacrifice clearly led their children in building a foundation of worship in the revelation of who God is. Never underestimate the influence and impact of a mother who’s own revelation of God leads her to worship the Lord and raises her children with a revelation of who God is. For in creating homes of worship our children can grow in their own revelation of God and respond in lives of sacrificial worship. 

Daily Bread

I’ve spent the better part of this year feeling anxious about money. Being in ministry, it’s easy to wonder where provision is going to come from.. We have always had enough, always have had exactly what we need, and yet I still worry if the Lord will keep to His promise. 

This was a major struggle for me this month. I was offered a full-time job at a different ministry; a promise of having a steady, generous income that would give me the illusion of comfort, stability, and financial freedom. On one hand, I felt like this job was a gift from the Lord, that I had the freedom to choose it. On the other hand, I felt deep down that agreeing to this job would take me away from the call He has on me regarding worship and prayer in Canada; the mission my heart burns for. I also knew that my yes would largely be due to my worry about money… not a great place to start. I felt the Lord was challenging me in this—would I jump ship and rely on my worldly understanding of provision or remain faithful to what He’s called me to already? 

At the heart of it, I was struggling to let God be THE provider. A job, a home, money in the bank, purpose and fulfilment, satisfaction with my ministry, security for the future; these things I felt like I needed to take into my own hands. To control every outcome, to rely on my understanding of what I think is best for me. This is so often how we as Christians live, without even knowing it. We think we are surrendered to the Lord, that we believe He will provide, and then we strive and strive and strive out of anxiety and fear that there won’t be enough. This job opportunity was a HUGE wake-up call for me in this area. There are still parts of me that want to cling to my own understanding of provision, to be the sole provider of my life. 

We are instructed to pray “give us this day our daily bread,” (Matt 6:11), not “give us today everything we’ll ever need again.” The whole point is that we keep coming back to the Provider rather than looking for an alternative, one-time breakthrough. This path is harder, but richer.

If this is speaking to you in any way, there is no guilt, shame, or condemnation in what I’m saying. I’m highlighting a part of life that the human heart is bound to struggle with. The wrestle between surrender and control is one of the main themes we see throughout Scripture… no wonder we wrestle with it to this day. My encouragement to you (and to me) is that Jesus is our daily bread, enough for you today. And He will be enough for you tomorrow, even if His provision doesn’t look like what you thought it would. Eat the fresh bread today and take comfort knowing that there will be more tomorrow. Even if you only have enough faith for today, tomorrow will worry about itself. He knows every need, desire, struggle, and hope, and He will prove Himself faithful to always be enough.

Living On The Altar: Worship In Community

Psalm 133:1 encourages, “how good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!” What a beautiful thing – something we were created for – to worship the One we love as the body and bride of Christ. When I consider “worship in community”, I picture moments of freedom where dancing, singing, and shouting break out in a room as praise erupts and sweet incense rises – when Jesus chooses to meet us with His manifest presence and encounter us as we allow the expression of our adoration to come out in song, in dance, in joy erupting.  

These moments are so precious. 

An invitation: “Press deeper, Hope.” Different memories flood my head – difficult conversations with ones I love, tearful confessions to a friend or mentor when I have fallen short again and again, moments where anger or bitterness have risen up and I’ve surrendered to the Spirit’s prompting to lay it down. Deeper: a night I really needed rest, but knew a friend in the hospital needed a visit, hosting friends for a meal when money is tight and food is short, being vulnerable with my own needs and wounds, letting someone in even when it’s hard, asking for help when it’s embarrassing, waiting on Him and choosing to love hard and real in a world that wants to isolate and hide us away. 

A life laid down, a living sacrifice, a broken and contrite spirit – THIS is my worship. He isn’t only after my song – He is after my heart; He wants my everything. 

The very first time the word worship appears in Scripture is not to describe song or music; rather when a father is asked to lay down his son – the very promise he had waited for his whole life. God asked for everything – a son laid out on the altar, and a father’s heart completely surrendered – a surrender that could come only from a knowing, a trust, and a love for the One who asks for it all. 

Oh, is it ever beautiful when we gather as a city and sing Him our praises. How pleasing and delightful it is to gather with the Bride of Christ and lift His name, honour Him in song, in dance, in unity. Let us not leave these spaces unchanged and let not our songs be the confines of our worship. As we behold Him, we become more like Him. Let these times of beholding be in spirit and in truth – radically transformative. Let our lives be laid out on the altar “as living sacrifice[s], pleasing and acceptable to Him.” Let sin not have a hold; where there has been hiddenness, let there be light! Let us worship with our lives just as we do with our words and song. Let us not be among those addressed in Isaiah 1 – with worship and festivals that are detestable to Him. Let rather our songs spring from hearts fully surrendered, formed in the Secret Place by a deep knowing of our lover, and be lifted to join in the song of the Bride, the praises of His body.

Let our worship also be known in our relationships, in our interactions, in our service, in our unreserved YES to Jesus. This YES – a life laid down, the surrendering of the very promise we have waited our entire lives for on the altar, a broken and contrite spirit, sin being brought to the light -can only come from a true knowing of Jesus – a silent devotion, a deep adoration, a covenant between lovers. From this place alone can we give our full yes to Him and a full yes to community. How beautiful it is to join together in song, and how beautiful it is to join together in carrying one another’s burdens, in lifting one another in prayer just as we lift our voices in song, in laying our lives down for one another. Let this be our worship – pleasing and acceptable to the One we adore. Let us be known by our love – for Him, for one another. To me, THIS is true worship in community. Does He have your yes? I promise you He’s worth it.